Book Deals…The Real Deal

Oh my gosh this is too funny. If I hadn’t been reading Jay Gesin’s Anthem Book Blog, I wouldn’t have seen this piss take on the Publisher’s Lunch Deals.

For those of you who are trying to sell your manuscripts, it’s both inspiring and frustrating to watch the big huge moneymakers that pass through the PLD newsletter. Jay found that John Scalzi gave a reality spin on his blog, and writers are chiming in with their thoughts on the subject.

I like the ones that were listed on Anthem Blog, so I’ll copy those here too so you can have a laugh. Thanks Jay and John for helping us keep our sense of humor on a not so funny subject! And yes, I agree that PL should use your deal definitions in addition to theirs.




$5,000 to $10,000: A “Meh” Deal. It’s not great, you know. But you can pay some bills. Get a few of these, and a tolerant spouse with a regular income, and you can tell your day job to piss off. This year, anyway.

$10,000 to $20,000: A Not Bad Deal. Note that “not bad” here should be said with a slight appreciative rise of the eyebrows and a small approving nod — this is the level at which the money begins to look not embarrassing both to writers and non-writers. A couple of these, and you’ll definitely be punting the day job (I did, anyway).

$20,000 to $100,000: A “Shut Up!” Deal.This needs to be said in the same enviously admiring vocal tone as a teenage girl might use to her girlfriend who is showing off the delicious new pumps she got at Robinsons-May for 30% off, or the vocal tone (same idea, lower register) Jim Kelly used when one of our number admitted to having at least a couple of deals in this range. With this kind of money, you don’t even need a supportive spouse to avoid the Enforced Top Ramen Diet (although, you know. Having one doesn’t hurt). But it’s not so much that the other writers actively begin to hate you.